PART 4 – Replanted in Truth

Memoir Reflection – Part 4 of the Series

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🛠️ Deconstructing the Old

Letting go of hype and rebuilding our faith on the solid truth of God’s Word

This new freedom was refreshing. For the first time in years, there were no ministry demands on my time. I began posting videos on YouTube, teaching the Word of Christ as I understood it—seeking to be faithful with what I had received.

In January 2019, my husband and I both sensed it was time to find a new spiritual home. But in our area, churches that preached the truth of God’s Word were few and far between. We had grown weary of the Word of Faith, Pentecostal, and NAR teachings that had shaped so much of our past. One day, we decided to shake off those influences and visit the local Reformed Baptist Church.

It was a seismic shift.

They sang hymns—not the latest worship songs. There was no clapping, no raised hands, no spontaneous “Amen!” from the congregation. And the preaching… Expository preaching—verse by verse, line upon line—was something entirely new to us. I struggled. My heart missed the emotional highs, the expressive worship, the familiar rhythms of Pentecostalism. My husband, however, found peace in the quiet. He was grateful to be out of the noise.

I hadn’t anticipated how painful the transition would be. Resigning from our previous church meant losing our entire church family. I felt isolated, useless. Friends from our past laughed and sniggered at the idea of us attending a Baptist church—one they mockingly called “the chosen frozen.” And now, I was one of them. A “chosen frozen,” being taught the Word—Scripturally.

“Sanctify them in the truth; Your word is truth.” —John 17:17

But the deeper struggle was internal. I didn’t even know how to pray anymore.

I had spent years declaring, confessing, and engaging in emotional spiritual warfare—rituals that stirred the senses but lacked biblical grounding. Letting go of those practices felt like losing my spiritual language. I had depended on feelings, on emotional highs, on listening for the Holy Spirit to speak in subjective impressions. But now, knowing much of it was unscriptural, I felt stripped. Silent. Lost.

I remember sitting in prayer, waiting for the “presence” to come. But it didn’t. There were no goosebumps, no inner voice, no emotional surge. Just silence. And in that silence, I felt abandoned. Had I lost my connection with God?

“Be still, and know that I am God.” —Psalm 46:10

Stillness was foreign. And frightening.

I missed the feeling of God’s presence. I missed the adrenaline of warfare prayers. But I began to realize that I had been chasing experiences, not truth. And so, in the quiet, I turned to the only place where truth is never silent: the Word of Christ.

Like the Bereans in Acts 17:11, I began to search the Scriptures—carefully, prayerfully, persistently.

“They received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so.”

I should have been doing this all along. But I had trusted what came from the pulpit. After all, thousands of churches across the world were preaching the same things—why would I question it?

Now I saw: truth isn’t determined by popularity. It’s measured by fidelity to Scripture.

The elder and I had several discussions. I couldn’t believe what he was teaching was biblical. Had I been deceived for so long? Was it possible that I didn’t truly know the truth anymore?

“The unfolding of Your words gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple.” —Psalm 119:130
“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” —Psalm 119:105

In March 2019, we became members—at my husband’s insistence and much against my will. I wasn’t convinced this was our spiritual home. But God was doing something deeper. He was stripping away emotionalism and rebuilding my foundation on the sufficiency of Scripture.

Hebrews 1:1–3 began to shape my thinking:

“Long ago, at many times and in many ways, God spoke to our fathers by the prophets, but in these last days He has spoken to us by His Son… He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of His nature.”

I began to see that truth isn’t measured by how it makes us feel—but by how faithfully it reveals Christ. The Word of God, rightly handled, was exposing error and healing wounds I didn’t know I had.

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.” —2 Timothy 3:16

This was not just a change in church—it was a reformation of the heart. I was learning to trust the Word over my emotions, to rest in Christ rather than chase spiritual highs, and to pray not for feelings—but for faithfulness.

I was being replanted—not in noise, not in declarations, not in emotional warfare—but in truth.

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✨Hymn & Prayer

At this point in my journey, God was teaching me to be replanted in truth. The hymn “Speak, O Lord” captures that prayerful longing:

Speak, O Lord, as we come to You
To receive the food of Your Holy Word.
Take Your truth, plant it deep in us;
*Shape and fashion us in Your likeness…*¹

And so my own prayer echoed those words:

Prayer
Lord, I come with empty hands, asking You to plant Your truth deep in me. Strip away what is false, shallow, and emotional, and replace it with the solid food of Your Word. Shape me in the likeness of Christ, and help me to trust Your voice in Scripture above every fleeting feeling. May Your Word be my lamp, my anchor, and my joy.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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📖 Suggested Reading

If you are wrestling through the same shift—from noise to truth, from feelings to faithfulness—these resources may help:

• Jerry Bridges, Trusting God – a reminder that God’s hand is sovereign even when life feels uncertain.
• John MacArthur, Strange Fire – a careful look at how experience-driven faith can lead us astray.
• Elisabeth Elliot, Suffering is Never for Nothing – wisdom for those learning to rest in God’s sufficiency, not in emotional highs.

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🌿 To Be Continued…

In Part 5, we’ll step further into the foundation God was laying. The Scriptures that replanted me in truth also began to open my eyes to the breathtaking doctrines of grace—God’s sovereignty in predestination, His hand in providence, and the unshakable truths of the five solas of the Reformation.

These were not just abstract doctrines—they became the bedrock of a faith no longer built on feelings, but on the glory of God alone.

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References:

¹ Keith Getty & Stuart Townend, “Speak, O Lord,” © 2005 Thankyou Music (admin. by Capitol CMG Publishing). Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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